Thursday, March 02, 2006
God, I hate Ikea.
You should try it - its so much better than the old way. Whatever that was...
That glazed look..
A simple solution, for a problem that has bothered us for some time.
Isn't it annoying?
Still, most of the roof is covered, and it'll be getting warmer soon, when spring comes.
Friday, February 24, 2006
What are the scores, George Doors?
Gosh, this is getting good.
A "fitted" kitchen
How do you plead?
I don't remember seeing it on the original plans, but we now appear to have some sort of dock, built on our upstairs landing.
Presumably, when all the work has been completed, we will be putting the builder on trial for Crimes Against Conservation.
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
But this bacon tasted pretty much the same to me.
Now that's nice
Funny how clay, which is only really posh mud, could cost so much money. But probably worth it, eh?
No, we're fine, really.
Helen is even relaxing with a nice large glass of wine. Gosh, she's drinking it quickly. Really, really quickly.
We love our friends
How did we repay their kindness? By breaking their towel holder.
Monday, February 13, 2006
Is this right?
So now we have two bedroom doors.
This will be useful for re-enacting various theatrical farces; the French maid can leave via one door, while a Vicar bursts through the other with his trousers around his ankles.
Friday, February 10, 2006
Real and present danger
The newspaper is hanging there purely so that - just before you plunge to your death on the floor below - you hear a faint rustling noise to remind you of the lack of any restraining rail.
It certainly makes night-time wee-wee a little more exciting...
Toilet's last stand.
It has, quite literally, swallowed all the crap we've given it.
But now, the walls grow ever nearer, the floor is removed and we all know the end is near.
Goodbye faithful toilet. And thank you...
The very real difference..
I mean, yes, there's no grass visible, and the chickens can't get in anymore, but equally I can't see us sitting down for 'us tea' in this room any time soon.
Monday, February 06, 2006
1000 words = 1 picture
We have had some problems with the new plumbing (the fact that all of the builders refer to the plumber as "Captain Flood" should have warned us, really). On several occasions, water has been seen dripping through the ceiling. We put pots and pans out to catch the drips, we curse the plumber and we step around the puddles.
So, when the ceiling began to drip again, we were not overly concerned. Newspapers were distributed, a tray was put on top of the cupboard where the worst of the dripping was, and Captain Flood's ears began to burn as we cursed him, his forebears and his descendants.
Then one of the children used the toilet. Suddenly the dripping accelerated. And it was no longer completely clear. Is it my imagination, or do those drips look, well, slightly yellowish?
Yes, the pipe had fallen off the back of the toilet, meaning that it flushed directly onto the ceiling behind the lavatory wall.
And all of this into a kitchen where Helen was busily making sandwiches for school lunches. So busily, that when she needed something from the cupboard beneath the catching tray, she wrenched open the cupboard without a thought. The door caught the bottom of the - now brimming - tray, which tilted suddenly and dispensed its contents. Over the sandwich lady, and indeed the entire kitchen. The little that didn't spill was catapulted into the air when the tray struck the worktop on its way down. The walls were running.
Gentle reader, I must draw a veil over both the painful recriminations and the vile smells....
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Look what we did
After months of decline, UK house prices began to rise again in September 2005.
Coincidence? I don't think so.
Future graphs will include:
- 'Personal Bankruptcies in the South-East, 2006';
- 'Incidence of women found clubbed to death with Aga brochures';
- 'Frost-bite in the pre-teen years'
Monday, January 30, 2006
Notice too the very thick and highly insulating silver stuff. The temperature inside is begining to diverge from the temperature outside, at long last.
Looking a little better..
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
A veteran recalls
Many had thought the extension would be over by Christmas. They were wrong.
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
Now Beatrice can just walk into her new bedroom.
However, if she does, she will fall through the floor, and break her neck.
The stupid child.
It is now possible to suddenly appear outside what was an upstairs window whilst someone is on the toilet, with hilarious consequences.
Friday, January 13, 2006
There's something very British...
The only thing missing is the end of the toilet roll being folded to a point. I always think that's a nice touch.
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Say goodbye to unpleasant toilet smells.
Fresh air is so much more economical than all of those nasty deodorizors, and of course it discourages those who were previously liable to settle in with a good book for hours. Now we just dump-and-go.
Where'd it go?
Five minutes after this, it began to rain.
Still, it could be worse. We could owe the blurred bloke on the roof a whole load of money for doing this. Er...
Monday, January 09, 2006
Beatrice's new room
Apparently, it feels much warmer than the room she's currently in, and is a lot cleaner as well.
Sunday, January 08, 2006
Oh Air Miles..
The work progresses towards completion, and dons an elephant-man mask.
"I am not a monster. I am an extension. I am entering into a dialogue with the existing building. I am respecting the local vernacular"
Saturday, January 07, 2006
I fear that the days of gourmet meals are probably over, or at least temporarily suspended.
And the oven door is open since this is currently the only form of heating we have.
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
The kindness of friends..
It's hard to care much about the mud and the lack of central heating when your friends invite you to "look after" their house - and all the lovely facilities therein - while they're away.
The only time we leave this hot-tub is to pop back to what we now consider to be our old house to feed the old chickens.
Ivor & Annie, we love you.
What do you plan for the garden?
The builder recently asked us what we plan to do with the garden.
Hmmmm.... Bit less mud? More live plants? Fewer steel girders? Not so many toilets?
After careful consideration, we have concluded the following: we have absolutely no idea.
(Although the chickens will, of course, be retained)
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Mummy, it's snowing!!
Less amusingly, it's also below zero in Mummy and Daddy's current room.
Friday, December 23, 2005
It may be a building site, but we can forget all that, with a selection of sophisticated decorations.
Half-close your eyes and you could be at any of the stately homes of England.
It seems so quiet (sniff)
And gosh, the house seems so big now they're gone.
We miss them already.
Still, not too windy right now.
Monday, December 19, 2005
Hurray for Sunday!
Look at me. Look how high I am!
By the way, the land you can see at the back is where John Prescott plans to build an enormous "affordable" housing estate, with a chip shop, just as soon as we've finished our extension. Probably.
Saturday, December 17, 2005
.. Beatrice can understand why we needed her to move out of her bedroom and into the spare room "just for a short while".
But am I bovvered?
But Helen is wearing at least 5 layers of clothing, so she ain't bovvered.
The children are refusing to leave their beds.
Friday, December 16, 2005
|High 1 |
|High 2 |
|High 6 |
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
The white wooden bit lurking sheepishly at the back knows its days are numbered. It will be in bits in a skip 'ere long.
And look, at the bottom of the picture: say farewell to grass-cutting misery with new, improved "sea-o'-mud". Kids (and hens and escaped rabbits) just love it.
You'll always find me in the kitchen..
Just for a laugh
I'm sure there's a good reason for this, but it don't 'alf feel odd being "at stool" in the middle of the room.
Just like the real world.
Hang on a minute...
This is deliberate, as it prevents us having to live in our garden for the duration of the coldest winter since 1963